Always on the search....

Amp after amp after amp after amp...... neverending cycle for me.

I've been playing guitar since I was 17. Since then I don't know what all equipment I have used. From my mom's genuine vintage Fender Mustang and Princeton Reverb combo to Crate, to Peavey, back to Fender stuff, Mesa, Bogner, Fender again, and again. It's rediculous!! Along with countless effects that I have purchased and shortly thereafter sold (Thank you eBay!!!). My quest for "the sound" is not unlike that of any other musician I would guess, but man does it get excessive!!! Musiciand know these pangs for new technologically advanced audio nirvana!!! Then we seem to always gravitate back to the good ole tube amp in it's many forms and fashions!!!

Why is it this way?

I was talking to my dad about this the other day. He, of course, didn't get it. "Son, I just don't know why you buy these amps and sell them almost immediately! I don't think they make the one you're looking for!!" A completely understandable response!! I don't understand it sometimes either. But as I look over my dad's property and see several projects strewn about, I think to myself," Self, he just doesn't get it in musical equipment terms. He DEFINITELY knows what it is to search for the right parts. The quest for that particular something." And then I started thinking... I know... always dangerous for me....

There are certain things that human beings (not just musicians) go through or experience in one form or another. There are two things at work here IMO, that we all go through.

1- Greed-

That's right greed; envy; jealousy. This is definitely the darker of the two things I think play a role in this "search" for that certain something. Let's be honest: we all go through this feeling at least once and it usually strikes us in the area we care the most about, or at least in an area that we show particular interest. I mean, it's hard for me to be jealous or envious of a television repairman's job or whatever. I'm just not interested in it. But, when I go see a hoppin' (or whatever you kids say these days) band perform, I can't help but want to be up there on stage!!! I always size up the gear and take notes on what/how they are playing. Then later I sell all my amps and buy the one they were playing only to realize that AIN'T the sound I want! :) But I think there is something more important at work when we realize that we're looking for something. Please.... continue..... to number 2

2- We're all searching.... (ok I know it's not parallel, but I couldn't think of one word to describe)

Inside each one of us there is a desire to search; to know; to learn. It's just there. Whether you are that TV repairman seeking a deeper understanding of the LCD or LED or old tube type television sets, or if you're a musician trying to find a "sound". It all boils down to that innate desire to know. to KNOW things about ourselves; about our world, about our environment. Maybe even about why we're here. Doesn't it make sense that all this can be connected? I think it does. I think that it is something that is woven into the fiber of the human thread. Something we can't separate because it defines us. Maybe this is too deep of a though coming strictly from acquiring gear as a musician, but it seems like actually looking at these things in our lives can help us to understand things a little better. Have you ever thought about what you search for? Or why you search for it? Or if it has any bearing on the way you look at life? Next time you just have to have a certain car, or a certain guitar or amp, or a certain house, or etc etc etc, ask yourself why? Think about how that plays into you being YOU. And then tell me it's coincidence that we all feel that way about things.

In the beginning there was....

So, this will probably be a short post, but I just got back from hanging out with one of my best friends, who happens to be an artist. We talked very little about art, but I thought about it alot on the way home. I thought about our fascination in one form or another of art and creation. Some like to create.... art, music, sculpture, cars, computers, programs, and the list goes on.... Some enjoy and appreciate and admire those creations. We thrive on creativity. You say," I'm not a creative soul," well I have to differ with you there. Maybe you haven't really thought of yourself that way. Maybe you haven't found your creative ability. Maybe you have been ok with drafting on others creative juices. All of these are possible scenarios for all of us at one time or another.

Here's the deal:

Creativity gives you several things that are necessary for your life: makes you use your mind and imagination, keeps your eyes and heart open to new things, allows you to look at all situations in a variety of ways. These are all things that will help you get through the good days and the bad. Will it always make it easy? Nope. Not gonna happen. No magic bullet there. But it will let you see bad circumstances in different ways. It will give you personal satisfaction to be able to accomplish a challenge. It will open doors to new adventures. Musician? Artist? Photographer? Bloggist? :) Poet? Woodworker? Arts/Craftsy person? Inventor? Designer? There are so many things you can be creative with in your life!!!

Ever here the phrase "trying to find myself"? Force yourself to EXPRESS YOURSELF in creative ways and you may just understand what that means! Don't be afraid of what people think! Don't worry too much about how you appear and who you impress. Express yourself however you need to BE you. You'll find that life is more satisfying when you can actually take some pride and fulfillment out of doing something your own way and helping the world, as well as yourself, to know YOU.